Katy & Wiz.

Last night I performed at Fralo’s. And it was a reminder of why I go out there in the first place.

There was a birthday party going on, and there were a few little girls who kept coming up and asking me to perform various Katy Perry covers.

Side note: I pretended I had never heard “This is How We Do” because I really didn’t want to figure out all the words to that one. And I also said I didn’t know T.G.I.F. cause I didn’t feel good about singing about hangovers. Is that bad of me?

Another side note: I keep getting asked to perform “See you Again.” Do I look like Wiz Kahlifa?

Anyway, I basically had back-up dancers the whole night, and it reminded me of when I was their age, dancing around at my dad’s Army Band concerts in while we lived in Alaska. I had no shame. I just wanted to be a part of the fun.

One of the girls kept insisting that she sing a song of her own. She reminded me of me a little bit, and I hope that one day, she gets to be the one on stage. She had such a sweet little voice, and I admire her bravery. I surely couldn’t have gotten up in front of strangers (or even my family or friends) at that age.

Also, the free pizza gives an excuse for Mark and I to eat delicious pizza way, way too late at night.

 

Toe Tappers.

We have one of those baby rear-view mirrors so we can keep an eye on Jake while we drive.

Yesterday while out and about I started blasting that “nah, nah, honey I’m good” song, and I noticed Jake started raising his arms up and moving his little body as much as he could in his seat. And it made me so happy.

And it reminded me of why I do what I do.

Music is such an important part of our lives, and the soundtrack to our lives should be fun and happy and beautiful and something you can tap your toes too. It should also have music that moves you, and relates to you, and comforts you.

But it made me sad as I thought more and more about the music that is on the radio these days, realizing that the messages in the music are not things I want my children to honestly relate to. Sure, “Honey, I’m Good” is a fantastically catchy song, and technically the message of it is that he wants to avoid drinking too much so that he doesn’t accidentally cheat on his girl. Or something like that. So it could be worse.

But still. Is that the best we can do?

I want to make music that makes people feel good–good about themselves, good about life, and good about the messages they’re hearing.

I’m still trying to balance family life with my growing music career, and it can be a challenge. But I hope you stay with me through the journey!

and P.S. Playing at Fralo’s pizza tonight from about 7-9:30 :)

 

Choosing to be Happy.

I just finished a book (well, there’s like 2 chapters left, so close enough) called “You Can Be Happy No Matter What” by Dr. Richard Carlson. My sister-in-law gave it to me a few years ago when I was struggling with anxiety, and I finally got around to reading it.

Side note: Anyone else read in their bath tub? I feel like I can’t read anywhere else. I have read so many books accompanied by bubbles. I highly recommend.

Anyway. This book has changed my life and inspired me in so many ways. I have struggled with anxiety, OCD, crazy mood-swings, hormonal issues, a bad temper, you name it. But reading this book, it finally clicked in my head–Happiness is a choice. It’s not something that will happen if I get to a certain place in my life. I am always “one thought away” from being a happy person.

I have always strived to be happy and positive, but it isn’t always easy. Some days its like I just WANT to dwell on negative thoughts and be miserable. But being happy is so much better! And since happiness is a state of mind, why not just switch gears and be happy instead?!

For instance: Today at Ross, I had to wait a while for the one and only handicap dressing room (the only dressing room that could fit my stroller). After a good long time, a teenager came out. And I felt my natural instincts kick in. I wanted to be like “Uh, how about saving the big room for people who actually need it!” and I felt myself feeling more and more irritated. But then I stopped, and recognized that what I was feeling was a result of my own negative thoughts, not the girls’ choice to use that particular dressing room. So I cleared my head, and was happy again. Bam!

Seriously, go get this book. I have been such a happier person, and it has impacted the whole spirit of our home. When mama’s happy, everyone’s happy. And it’ s such a more pleasant way to live!

I wrote a song about it too, of course. In the works of recording it so I can share it with you, incase you’d rather get the message in 3 minutes rather than 30 bathtub sessions 😉

Shopping with Children, Chocolate Chip Cookies, and Yellow.

Do you know how hard it is to find yellow clothes?

Not nasty citron…not mustard… yellow. Creamy, dreamy yellow.

I have searched the better part of San Antonio for the perfect yellow dress. Or skirt. Or blouse. Or anything.

And it does not exist.

Well, it does, but not for me. I want my clothes to be modest; going to my knees, covering my shoulders, not busting with cleavage.

But if I wanted to wear a bright yellow romper, or a see-through crop top, I could totes do that.

Side story:

I was given multiple signs today that people who do not shop with their kids do not like people who shop with their kids.

And I’m pretty sure rich people don’t like kids.

Okay. That’s a lie. But I went to a Saks Fifth Avenue Off 5th store (Nordstrom Rack, but for Saks Fifth). I was hoping that if I stepped out of my comfort zone and into ritzy territory, I might find my dream dress. Or anything yellow.

So I go in, Jake on my hip, and get ready to strap him into a fancy cart.

But there’s a sign on the cart.

“Please do not put children in cart.”

I searched around and flipped metal flaps around and came to the realization that their carts were not equipped to strap in my hunk of baby love.

I’m pretty sure I stood there for at least 5 minutes with a look that must have said “The nerve!”

I went outside, found a cart from another store, and brought it in. And after 5 minutes I didn’t find anything in the clearance rack under $200. So I left.

Another side story:

I went into Urban Outfitters, and immediately knew it wasn’t for me.

But I saw an elevator. YES! I can go to the upper level and exit in a new part of the mall and find new stores!

I go up, see signs pointing to the exit, you know, big, green, giant “EXIT” signs. And I finally locate the exit. Kind of a random door, but there was no sign on it that said “emergency exit only” or anything. So I pushed.

It didn’t move. I pushed harder, desperate to get me and my child out of this hipster store that we clearly didn’t belong in.

That’s when the alarm went off. And all the hipster people around me plugged their ears. And I tried making the great escape with my stroller but it kept running in to clothes racks.

And about that time I decided to start heading back to my car.

I don’t belong in malls.

Also, I tried making chocolate chip cookies tonight. I made two different kinds. Both basically suck.

I think I’m gonna be one of those moms who buy the delicious cookies at Costco. It’s just not my thing. I wanted it to be. But I’ve accepted that not everyone can be a great chocolate chip cookie maker. And I’m mostly okay with that.

3:45pm

I love being a stay at home mom. My days with Jake are so wonderful. He’s so active and curious and it’s so much fun.

But right around 3:45pm, I am super duper glad that my gym is within walking distance.

At that point, Jake gets whiny. And at that same point, I start feeling my patience a bit lacking.

So we brave the 100 degree San Antonio weather and take the 20 minute stroll to the gym.

Jake gets to play at the day care there, and mama gets some alone time. And since the gym is basically the only way I get alone time, I’m basically forced to work out and be healthy against my will. So it all works out.

My progress has been slower than I would like, but I’m already 20 pounds lighter than I was right before getting pregnant with Jake. So that’s progress.

High five to me.

Also, I finally finished Jake’s scrapbook. But as I was putting all the pages together and adding extension rods in the binding to fit them all… I discovered I need a much bigger scrapbook. I guess I got a little crazy and documented way too much. But whatevs.

I’m gonna go put my little boy to bed.

 

Walking.

Jake walks now. Like a pro.

Recently he he decided it was way cooler to waddle than crawl on his hands and knees. And I’m so glad. And it’s so cute.

Except now we have to get him shoes.

Yeah. While everyone else was buying $60 moccasins for their newborns, we were all, “psh, the kid doesn’t even walk. He don’t need shoes.”

But we no longer have that excuse. And our kid has been walking around on his bare feet like a doofus.

I promise we’re good parents. Mostly.

I got my stuff in the mail today to make my menu planner. I have never had so much fun thinking about food. That’s probably a lie. But it’s gonna be awesome.

Been working with my dad getting some songs ready to record my first real demo. Which is fun. And very educational for me. I forget that he totally knows what he’s doing. Why don’t I pick his brain more?!

The kittens are all open-eyed and crawling and perfect. Have you ever held and kissed four baby cats at once? You should.

It occurred to me tonight that I eat popcorn way too much. Like, almost every night. I tell myself it’s practically zero calories. And the fake butter is zero calories. And it’s all just vegetables anyway.

We got a garden tower. And are going to have a fall garden. How grown up is that?

I’m just gonna stop typing now.

 

Clutter.

My mind is cluttered right now, so this post is going to be, too.

I’m going to a meeting for the San Antonio chapter of Nashville Songwriters Association International tonight. I went last month and it was an amazing experience. We just sit around and listen to each others songs and critique them. It’s seriously so much fun.

I recently discovered H&M. And I finally got myself a couple “mom” outfits that I actually feel good in. Besides yoga pants.

We moved Mama cat and her four kittens up into the guest room. They get more room, and we have our downstairs bathroom free again. It’s bliss.

And if you’re in the market for a cute creature, we have four that will be ready for adoption in a few weeks 😉

I’ve been in crafty/organize mode for a while now. I’m getting ready to put together this awesome meal plan (check out the tutorial here.) I’m super duper excited. I’ve also gotten a ton done for Jake’s scrapbook. It’s not going to be the classiest thing out there, and my horrible handwriting plagues every page, but hey, at least I’m having fun doing it.

I’m really excited about a new song I’ve written. It’s called “Yellow.” And it’s constantly stuck in my head. That’s a good sign, right? I’m thinking it might be one for the demo.

Speaking of demo, I finally have enough funds saved up from past gigs to be able to go to a legit studio and record a legit demo. You know, to like, send out to producers/record companies and what not. So we’ll see what happens!

We finally gave in and bought a pack and play contraption called the Joovy Room2. It’s amazing. Jake is playing in it with marbles and pots and pans and is just squealing in delight. And he’s not climbing on toilets or the couch or chairs. High five to us.

I got the worst hair cut ever recently. And I’m stuck with it. Until it grows out. So don’t look at me.

And also, don’t trust a first-time student with your hair. Even if it’s only $4. Unless you want to be a hermit for a while. Then it’s a totally fine idea.

I went to the ophthalmologist last week and I found out I might be able to get a lower prescription which would ironically fix my lazy eye problem. And I might even be able to get a sort of Lasik that would also help dramatically. So I might not have to wear coke bottle glasses. I might even be able to wear contact lenses again. Or maybe nothing at all. I’m so excited for the possibilities. I’ve been in glasses since I was 2. And had the eye patching. Yeah. I was that kid. So I freaking deserve a break!

I’m gonna go pay attention to my kid now.